I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
I would rather you cheat on me then you watch this season of Breaking Bad without me.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize
