I don't llike drinking between sober and blackout. Its boring.
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
God, I missed his penis.
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