Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
If I don't end up being a booty call for Valentine's Day, you wanna go to the movies?
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
Randomize
