i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
So the same day I accidentally bought waterproof mascara is the day I accidentally had shower sex. The world is finally on my side.
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
One day, tell me please to stop buying shots when I'm overwhelmed. I might have just broken a tooth
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Randomize
