Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(559): View more from California

I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great

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(315): View more from New York

in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."

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(970): View more from Colorado

If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.

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(516): View more from New York

That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.

(1-516): View more from New York

yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.

(516): View more from New York

Do you have to put it that way?

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(404): View more from Georgia

i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.

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(863): View more from Florida

I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.

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(479): View more from Arkansas

Did the game of beer pong go wrong before or after the cops and fire department showed up?

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(849): View more from

Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons

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(626): View more from California

I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.

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