speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
IN THE MIDDLE OF HOOKING UP, HE IS CALLED AWAY ON AN "EMERGENCY". FUCK THAT, MATT'S CAR IS NOT AS URGENT AS MY THIRST.
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize