i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
We pretended the crowd cheering the Thunder's win was cheering for us while we had sex on the couch.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
Tommarow we shall sacrifice the freshmen to the sun god
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
It was great. Except he kept asking me to lick his butthole, I was like firm no
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
