some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Considering adding a large amount of vodka to my tomato cup-a-soup at work. Save me.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I'm actually on the verge of cancelling a booty call because I have an early meeting tomorrow. If this is what adulthood is going to be like, I'll pass.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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