So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
So I can confidently say that I'm the only 3rd year engineering student who completed all 4 of their exams with One Direction pens
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
