This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
He said my vagina is harder to escape than the Temple of Doom.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Randomize
