Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
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