Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
I'm wearing green eyeshadow so even if I end up totally naked I still won't get pinched.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
theres a girl in the library eating whip cream out of a starbucks cup... only whip cream, im way to high for this shit
Randomize