How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
i convinced him to be a french maid for halloween. he has no idea what he's in for. i just ordered the breast forms.
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
You abruptly started screaming because they had and I quote “calamari on the hoof”
Randomize
