dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
I checked into jail on foursquare
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
I made out with the bride. You tell me how my night was
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
BRING THE BAGELS
Sorry I trained your dog in Spanish last night. At least he listens to someone now.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
Randomize
