Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
My roommates call me "Queen of the Skanks" I guess that means I've had a successful first month of college.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Ran into my FWB on my walk of shame and went back to her place. Even my walk of shames are awesome!!!
Randomize
