Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
You're just upset because I have cupcakes and boobs and you don't.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
