he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Today wasn't Sunday Funday, it was more like Sunday god is taking a shit on my life day
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
