I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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