why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
no its okay don't call 911, she's alive. just stopped by her house and banged on her door. she said she turned her phone off because she "had to be alone with her shame and embarassment". typical.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Filthy. I need to be power hosed with holy water.
Last night I made the hotel shuttle driver take me to Walgreens for birth control, and Pringles.
They were both high priority
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
he just fucked me for my cheese.
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize
