turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
