question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
At one point he was so drunk he was carrying around a bottle of patron drinking out of it and falling everywhere and every time he spilled it he would scream "THERE GOES TWENTY DOLLARS."
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
Yeah I was just reminiscing about that time a seagull shit on your head at the beach
PS there is a naked boy in my bed and I just left for the bar...
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
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