I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
No I'm not lying to you. I'm just not telling you the whole story. There's a massive difference.
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