don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
just tried googling 24 hr taco bell and when i typed "24 hour" it autocompleted with fitness. buzzzz killllll
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
you can't tell me it's over and send me pics of you and your cat?
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
He let me keep my Michael Jordan Bulls jersey on during sex.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
Fun Fact: I do not remember what its like to be sober between drinking off and on for two weeks at my "vacation" and being on painkillers for my mouth now
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
