So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
I feel like death gave me a hand job
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
