what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
Just painted my nails at the bar... I may be getting too comfortable here.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
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