His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize