Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I was thinking about baking his mom "sorry you found out i was sleeping with your son" cupcakes
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
I just heard a 350 lb guy with a stutter describe getting blood in his eye as he was shanking his cellmate and, more generally, how to survive as a white guy in jail.\n\nYou should really consider going to some AA meetings
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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