Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
I poured somre cereal, realized the chocolate to flake ratio was off, tried to fix it by digging through the box, gave up because of the difficulty level, and poured it back in the box. Being high is the best diet.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
The last time I've felt a woman's touch, the twin towers were compromised. You can wait like one week
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
anything below 65° is too cold to be naked on a roof
Randomize