i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Last night I had sex with one of the groomsmen I was in the wedding with. In a stairwell. 13 years my senior. Thinking I should retire from the bridesmaid gig.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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