he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
