But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I don't know what kind of soup they made, but it smells like condoms.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
Randomize
