this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I am like king midas for the gay community. everything I touch turns into a lesbian.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
Randomize
