Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
He shoved his balls through an egg carton and showed us a picture. They were surprisingly egg-like.
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
The night took a wrong turn after I found you smoking a blunt with a midget behind the bar...
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