Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
Babies are disgusting. I held one once. Then I washed my hands and rinsed my mouth out with wine.
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
Woke up at 8am and asked if she had coffee.... She handed me a shot of tequila...
Randomize
