so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
I'm at the point in my life where I'm gonna sell my eggs for cash
thankfully we both ride of shamed home together on razor scooters in dresses because we stopped for breakfast sandwiches too
Okay, I just reached peak living alone
I ate a piece of chocolate cake while jerking off
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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