just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I'm kinda amazed by how many times I've texted the word penis today.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
