You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
Stoned stonnnnnnned on the raaaaange
Guess who isn't pregnant with a random sex ocean baby?!?!
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
