Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
cracked out the beer snorkel again. that thing has a five for five record of getting me naked.
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
Have 7 min to kill while I wait for liquor store to open. Feels really awkward.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Randomize
