I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
