I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Would I chase a raccoon with a flaming stick sober?
Maybe don't sell him so much adderall next time. The other day during finals he was convinced that he could see the "molecules of life in the air" and kept reaching up slowly to grab them.
Everyone I slept with in 2016 is getting a Christmas card from me. Because I'm an adult.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
