the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
Grateful to be alive soliciting dick pics. Thankful i'm alive for these little things and especially these big ones too.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
