So my roomate was sunbathing this morning on the porch with a sock covering his penis
Sounds like a really classy character....
He is classy. It was argyle.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
Just put a picture of dead dolphins on her wall...told her the oil spill was her fault.
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
AND I NEED A VIKING FUNERAL OR MY GHOST ASS WILL SAUNTER ON OVER AND CASTRATE HIM FOR TECHNICALLY MURDERING ME
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