Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
he bit the head off a dead goose for 5 beers. this is my future boyfriend.
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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