your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I'm pretty sure his head is too big to fit between my legs. Worthless.
No more Irish car bombs ever.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
Do you have any idea how horrifying it is to hear your sister and her husband fucking then immediately go down stairs only to hear your parents fucking....... I wish I was Hellen Keller right now.
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
I just realized I wasn't at the party anymore. I was just sitting there with a vacuum.
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
