He looks too sensitive, like he's going to write me a poem and cry after the first time we have sex.
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
I need a picture of your dick for my friends birthday card
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
is it fun? or sober?
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
