If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
seriously i just wanna be friends
pass
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize
