Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
when I sang my humps to you I meant it.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
And the best part is I don't remember putting the condom in my pocket! Angels officially exist
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
Randomize