I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
When the tupperware hit the highway it was like a vomit bomb
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I wanna trust fall face first on a penis.
Randomize
