puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
i told him to take shots to cure a hangover and he told me i was "walking the steppingstones to alcoholism"
Woke up to 'distilleries' on the history channel. Proceded to vomit all over the floor. Back on the wagon today.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Randomize