why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
so i am drinking whiskey and watching home alone 2 by myself. it turns out moving to a foreign country isn't all that different after all.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
Well I woke up at my house so that's a plus. But I'm pretty sure I peed on my sofa because I woke up in the pee position.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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