Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I just saw the nastiest chick.
Where?
woke up next to her... fuck you jack daniels, fuck you
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
blah blah blah they called me an alcoholic because I threw my beer at a Jesus freak. it was for the best
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
He's on the porch naked. Help.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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